I always ask myself this question and often reflect it to the partners I work with. It actually relates to everything you do in life. You go to a restaurant and how you are being served, the food, the location a lot of aspects will make you go back or not. The buying process for massively large deals and small deals are actually the same. I was reading that in the investment banking world Spanish and Italian people do often well, because they work on the relationship better. Basically you get a better lunch and a more social, warm approach to people. It is not just liking someone, which will get you more business. Yes it will get you orders and short term business. Short term success is huge difference versus long term, WHY we do business together. The WHY is a very difficult process, whereby actually the interest of selling something completely disappears! When you have the right chemistry you know you are going to do business and all obstacles are not there. That is WHY I recommend to always nurturing your existing relationships, where you found the WHY. These relationships are often more than a person doing business with, they are involved in your life, they are ambassadors, and they make a difference for your business. So how do we find the WHY….everyone knows if there is no click between people how good the deal is, somehow it goes wrong. Sometimes the WHY changes due to a change in life of one of the 2, but it is basically the WHY which keeps you going for the good business. I mean the long term successful business that everyone needs to grow, enjoy and receive healthy business. Often when you are doing business you look where you can add value, which is a great 1st step. The 2nd is likewise thinking people, not on your hobbies or sport, but likewise philosophy. Don´t forget also your philosophy changes over time, so be honest to yourself. And finally the magical feel the most difficult one. We all have friends who are completely different in lifestyle, ambition, culture…..but the relationship is always good and nobody understands WHY. That´s the magical feel we all know, use very little, don´t get training in, unmeasurable, but a 100% guarantee for a successful long term business relationship. If we always use the understanding of the WHY, then we will grow ourselves and the business with exponential growth. Can you train this feeling? Yes you can, as with everything in life you can increase your knowledge, inner feel and develop your magical feel. Can you always get to this feeling? No you will make mistakes and as I said things can change over time and making mistakes is human and part of improving your magical feel. The question is ´how´ can I develop this feeling is an obvious one and basically you need to develop your inner and spiritual self. There are plenty of books, courses, meditation training which you can look up, but I recommend something different. At every end of a week, write down 5 persons you have met and take your time to read about that person, evaluate how you experienced the meeting, how it felt and than simply ask that person the WHY back. You can make your life easy to start with a friend, receptionist and then move it up to your business relationships. You will feel that your attraction towards people and view will change over time. You will suddenly attract people who are more aligned with you and that´s the WHY. Suddenly you will meet people who you connect with better in 5 minutes than friends who you think you know for a life time. Good luck with the WHY in your life!